This is something I would expect a layout artist to fix. I'm not good at backgrounds, and sometimes when drawing storyboards just hurriedly scratch something in just to let you know whre the chracters are.
This BG could be better drawn and composed. Composed first. Any suggestions on what's wrong with the composition and ways to fix it?
http://johnkstuff.blogspot.com/2009/05/good-compositions-take-self-control.html
I would either take out the tree in the center, so there is a clearing above the two characters. or I would omit that entire grove of trees and put them behind the bear instead, but making sure that they're a totally different value than the bear and the house, so they still stand out. or maybe just one big tree on the left side with a long branch that extends out over the characters along the top of the page, and is somewhat parallel to the bar on the door ( so that it will lead your eye to both the walking characters and the bear behind the house.
ReplyDeleteThere is definitely a lack of negative space to let the picture read. Perhaps I'd push the bushes down a bit so that the shape is behind the ranger fellas, so that they 'highlight' them. I don't know what else to call this phenomenon, but I see it in Eisenberg's Yogi compositions a lot-- a shape behind the characters (bushes, a mountain, etc) often sort of center the characters. It draws attention to them (if this doesn't make sense typed out, I'm sorry).
ReplyDeleteI think I might reduce the tree count, and only include two to the far left, which could be used to frame everything else, perhaps point towards Kaspar. This would create a lot of negative space, particularly on the right, which would draw more attention to Kaspar, too.
This is harder than I would have thought to articulate, but I'm happy now that I have permission to play with the backgrounds, more. I've got a version of one of your Kaspar doodles started, and I was wondering how much liberty I should take.
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ReplyDeleteI would take away the tree behind the door. Space the 2 trees on the left a little farther apart so they leaves and branches don't crowd each other. I think making the bushes a bit larger to frame the father and son. The tree closest to Kaspar should have elements that create a negative space that frames the door and a little over Kaspar. I don't think there should be too much open space around Kaspar. So by eliminating the tree behind the door and filling the space above the door with an overhanging branch will lead the eye to Kaspar. I like that Kaspar is not too obvious in the scene.
ReplyDeleteAlso the tree-stump home need to work better. The doorway and door don't match up. The door is hanging by a hinge at the bottom?
I tried doing a thumbnail to show what I mean. Upon doing so, I think that one large tree in the background might work better with the leaves (pine needles?) pointing down at Kaspar to lead the eye to his peeking.
ReplyDeleteThe single larger tree in the background will help set the scale of the forest, since it will be similar in size to the ranger's home.
I think everything is to close to each other, maybe because of the square format. the whole picture needs more space.
ReplyDeleteThe characters should be a little more separate from each other, so the trees in the back, they are to close and the shape of the branches has to have more negative space for the better reading of the whole picture.
I believe that it would be better if the "tree cabin" was aiming to the characters and not so straight up. I don't know, it's just an idea.
well, that's it